Added: Nicolaas Chesnut - Date: 18.01.2022 18:18 - Views: 35224 - Clicks: 6709
I think i'm on the verge of having an affair!
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Hi As the title says, i think i'm on the verge of having an affair. I've been with my husband for 17 years and married for nearly Since having our little boy, things have not been Thinking of having an affair. There is no physical relationship and hasnt been since i was 6 months pregnant. Our little boy is now 4. We used to be really close, always holding hands, kisses and cuddles but now nothing. I've told him on many occasions i'm unhappy with the way things are and yes certain things have changed but in all honesty i do not feel we are top of his priority list.
About a month ago i was out for a friends birthday and met this man. We got on really well and he was very keen. I've explained my situation to him and he is very understanding. We exchanged phone s and have been texting non stop since then. He is divorced, he found his wife in bed with someone else so walked out with nothing. Anyway, he gave me the courage to address whats going on in my own relationship and 2 weeks ago i told my husband it was over.
I no longer loved him and thought we should separate. We went and spoke with both sets of family and they were all heartbroken that i was not willing to give it another try. After a week of feeling completely torn in two, i agreed to work at it but in all honesty my heart really isnt in it.
Yes my husband is now making an effort and showing more affection to me but if i dont feel anything then whats the point. I explained to this man that i needed to try and fix my marriage and he understand thats that. It doesnt solve however the draw we feel towards each other, he sends me romantic messages everyday and genuinely makes me feel wanted. We are meeting again on friday to spend quality time together.
My husband thinks i'm on a works leaving do. Any advice would be welcomed. My head is literally all over the place. See last answer. Your browser cannot play this video. Gayle If YOU really want to make your marriage work then you would stop all contact with this other man however if you don;t want to work at it then you have to be honest with your dh. Don't go behind his back, be honest with him. I think sometimes in relationships we get so stuck in 'family time' we forget about 'couple time' and we take each other for granted but if you want it to work then you work and make sure that it does work.
Its always nice to get attention off someone else but flirting is harmless taking it further will only lead to heartbreak on someone part. THink how you would feel if your dh was meeting some woman behind your back. Be honest with yourself about what YOU want.
Good luck. Search for a thread. Family and other relationships I'm having an affair. Family and other relationships Married affair.
Family and other relationships i think im having an affair. Hi, I don't want to sound harsh but in my opinion meeting up and texting in the first place was wrong, you obviously do not want to be with your husband so leave you are only leading him on and making it harder for him to move on. I know you have spoken to him and have done the right thing in trying again but are you happy?? Put the shoe on the other foot how would you feel if your husband was doing to you what you are him?? Sorry if I sound mean but I really believe that if the thought of an affair even crosses your mind u don't really love the person you are with.
I hope you make the right decision and there will be happiness at the end of the tunnel and you will both find ppl who love and show you the attention u need. It may be difficult to truthfully do but ask yourself this question - if you had not met this other man would you still have separated from your husband? If you have made a decision to split up your family because of a man you have only known for a month then maybe it is not the right thing to do. I do sympathise with your situation, my husband used to be like yours and we spent years living in the same house in a virtually celibate marriage - his choice not mine.
He refused to try and work on his issues and so I concentrated all my efforts into giving the kids and him a happy home and put my feelings to one side. I think our situation would have continued in the same way had my husband not had a mid-life crisis when he hit forty in He ended up having an affair with a much younger work colleague that ended up nearly ruining all of our lives, our kids included. His affair cost me my family, my job and devastated us all.
The reality of losing everything hit my husband like a ton of bricks and changed him greatly - he is a far better husband and most importantly a far better father. Relationships get stale, boring and we often forget what it was that attracted us to our partners. Resentment often builds and we are too tired to put in the time and effort to get things back on track. I fought for my marriage mainly for my kids sake, they only have my husband and I and I knew they would not cope very well at all if we split up.
I made the right decision and although it has been hard everything is really good right now. It may be too late to save your marriage and if you genuinely feel this is the case then you need to be honest with your husband about the fact you have met someone new. He will inevitably be very upset but will be more hurt and angry if he finds out from someone else - this could cause a lot of bitterness and anger that could have Thinking of having an affair huge knock on effect on your children.
We all deserve to be loved, cherished and happy and it could be that you and this new man Thinking of having an affair meant to be together. If that is the case he will respect you enough to back off for a bit while you sort your home life out. I wish you the best of luck and hope you find a good resolution to your situation. Lane G. If your heart's not in it then be honest and tell your OH.
Please don't get involved with someone else until you have sorted our your own relationship and as a pp said if this other man you have known for a month is so special then he will respect you enough to wait until you head is not all over the place.
Good luck x. I think in my heart of hearts i know what i am doing is wrong. I am still going to meet this man on friday as like i said there is something that draws me to him. He has said he would happily be friends with me but obviously would like there to be a lot more. I am going to try and keep it on a platonic level, explain as such on friday and we'll see what happens from there. Thanks for all your responses.
Hi Tracy I wonder if the meeting on Friday is a good idea, I can see how confused you are, and I wonder how you can really work on fixing your relationship when you are in such close contact with this other man. This must be so confusing, but I do think that you need to take one path or the other, I can only imagine how hurt your husband would feel if he found out about this new relationship, especially when he is trying to make changes.
I think you must be honest with your husband; he has to Thinking of having an affair and understand that you have a massive void in your heart. I had a moment in my life, recently, when there was a man actually two who was very affectionate towards me for 4 years, before expressing his feelings. I have to say he is a charmer and his honesty and frankness swept me away. My husband, during this very period had a silly affair nothing sexualbut all this left me devastated and badly hurt.
This very morning, I sat down and explained to my husband that I want to feel excitement in my life, I want spring to feel my entire existence again, and that his actions do not fulfil my needs. I told him that I am about to fall for another man, and I do not want to do that, but the void I feel makes me want to smile back to anyone who will smile at me… I felt that I needed to do tell him so as to save our marriage.
I do not want to be consumed with guilt for destroying my relationship, and the family unit we have built, but I also do not want to settle for something less.
I felt that my husband was hurt but I also felt that he had understood what I was saying was not a mere tantrum of an emotional wreck. No one can tell you what to do, but I want to tell you that all men are the same, you better stay AND deal with what you know then try to run after the one you do not know.
Your new partner, may not be that great in two years down the line, will you be dumping him too. There is a Yorkshire saying…if in doubt do nout, may be you need some time to think too. Take time and restore your peace, you will see things clearer then. I wish you never to regret your decision. Lucine xx. Family and other relationships A Texting Affair. Family and other relationships Pregnant from affair. Family and other relationships Having an affair - I'm married and so is he. S L18ijt.
Can't find your answer? Right, platonic?
You already admit that you are on the verge of an affair, meaning you want to sleep with him. I feel sorry for your husband and your. Leave them and then go have your affair. Liz R You're having an affair.
You are not being honest with your husband. You are being deceitful with your children and your family as well as your husband. You're probably lying to friends too. Oh, and Mr. Found his wife in bed with another man? He should therefore be a man with an understanding of the pain and distress his involvement with you is going to unleash on the people around you. He clearly doesn't care.
I know my own experience with adultery was deeply distressing and I would never, regardless of strength of attraction, spend time with a man who was in another relationship. Grow up, act like an adult and face your responsibilities. Your first priority should be to your children and ensuring that they grow up in as pain-free, stress-free an environment as possible.Thinking of having an affair
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I think i'm on the verge of having an affair!