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Psychosexual Relationship Specialist Read full profile. How do you navigate the additional battles experienced with interracial relationships? What are the pitfalls you need to know about? This article details 6 of the true struggles experienced by interracial couples and what you can do to prevent them. According to Dr. Sidney Simon author of Values Clarificationdifferent value systems can easily cause conflict in a relationship. For example, Lina is an Asian woman married to an Australian named Steven.
In Asian culture, wealth creation is more important than relaxation.
Consequently, this interracial couple frequently experiences tension due to conflicting values. Lina could start her own business and allow Steven to focus his attention on whatever makes him happy. In other words, interracial couples can connect with each other through their shared interests, and respect and accept their differences.
For instance, constantly talking about curry may make your Indian partner feel offended. Your assumption that Indian people love curry can easily appear to be a stereotype.
Or dating a German and constantly bringing him or her beer and sausages. Many interracial couples think that their love for each other will make racism irrelevant. Many mixed ethnicity couples try to ignore or brush off disparaging remarks and awkwardness. However, this may cause communication breakdown and problems in the future. When dating and forming a relationship, communication is paramount.
This is especially true in interracial dating when a partner comes from a different background. Make sure that whenever there is an issue you address it immediately. If you take a resistant or defensive stance, then you will only cause more friction and tension.
Past generations tend to be fixed in their customs and beliefs. This can make it difficult for them to view your interracial relationship through a different and more liberating lens. Look for specific teachings within your ethnicity. Sharing common beliefs with others will go a long way toward accepting your choice in partner. When feeling judged as an interracial couple, couples often become closer to each other.
However, this may also lead to lack of boundaries in a relationship. This can be a recipe for disaster because individual posts and messages can easily be misunderstood and taken out of context. Henry Cloud author of Boundaries in Marriage states that setting boundaries is often an online process in a relationship. This question will reveal what really matters — that you need to get back into balance by resolving the triggered emotion. Your best and wisest actions will always come from an internal state of calm.
Unfortunately, not every friend will understand why you are dating someone from a different race. Instead of taking these comments to heart, resolve your own triggered emotions first. When someone is emotionally triggered, they may make rash or irrational comments which are completely out of character.
People can become so fixated on mentally analyzing their own busy life that they lose the mental bandwidth to think before they speak. Reset yourself into a state of calm whenever you feel triggered. Yes, sometimes, it can be a joke with no malice intended.
Acting out with superior comments tends to be more common in interracial dating and is generally due to other factors mentioned above, which trigger unwanted emotions. If you are the person making superior comments, you may want to ask yourself why you need to have this stance.
However, frequently making superior comments usually indicates that someone is feeling insecure and needs to deal with their own emotional triggers to come back into balance. These 6 real struggles of interracial relationships can be challenging, although in many cases easy to eradicate. Make sure you put the right strategies in place as mentioned above, to prevent problems before they occur.
We live in a world where everyone can find true love from any race. As you focus on being the best version of yourself, you will naturally feel more confident and at ease when relating with others. Featured photo credit: cindy baffour via unsplash. Eugene is Lifehack's Entrepreneurship Expert. He is the co-founder and creative lead of HighSpark, offering presentation training for companies.
Read full profile. As you move towards the spotlight, your body starts to feel heavier with each step. A familiar thump echoes throughout your body — your heartbeat has gone off the charts.
Sometimes, the anxiety happens long before you even stand on stage. If your body and mind are anxious, your audience will notice. What goes on in the inside, shows on the outside. Exercising lightly before a presentation helps get your blood circulating and sends oxygen to the brain. Mental exercises, on the other hand, can help calm the mind and nerves. Here are some useful ways to calm your racing heart when you start to feel the butterflies in your stomach:. The audience I want an interracial relationship notice you are nervous.
If you observe that this is exactly what is happening to you minutes before a speech, do a couple of stretches to loosen and relax your body. Not only that, it increases muscle efficiency, improves reaction time and your movements. Here are some exercises to loosen up your body before show time: Advertising. Ever felt parched seconds before speaking? And then coming up on stage sounding raspy and scratchy in front of the audience? This happens because the adrenaline from stage fright causes your mouth to feel dried out. A sip of water will do the trick.
It will also amplify your anxiety which prevents you from speaking smoothly. Meditation is well-known as a powerful tool to calm the mind. Meditation is like a workout for your mind. It gives you the strength and focus to filter out the negativity and distractions with words of encouragement, confidence and strength. Mindfulness meditation, in particular, is a popular method to calm yourself before going up on the big stage.
One thing people with a fear of public speaking have in common is focusing too much on themselves and the possibility of failure. Do I look funny? Do I look stupid? Will people listen to me? Instead of thinking this way, shift your attention to your one true purpose — contributing something of value to your audience. Notice their movements and expressions to adapt your speech to ensure that they are having a good time to leave the room as better people.
This is also key to establishing trust during your presentation as the audience can clearly see that you have their interests at heart. There are two sides constantly battling inside of us — one is filled with strength and courage while the other is doubt and insecurities. Which one will you feed? What if I forget what to say? All we do is bring ourselves down before we got a chance to prove ourselves.
This is also known as a self-fulfilling prophecy — a belief that comes true because we are acting as if it already is. Motivational coaches tout that positive mantras and affirmations tend to boost your confidents for the moments that matter most.I want an interracial relationship
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What it’s really like to be in an interracial relationship